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Random table · d50

Black Market Wares

What a fence, smuggler or back-alley dealer has under the counter today. Some of it is real, some is a scam, and some is trouble with a price tag.

Press roll — or pick any line below.

  1. 1A jar of “dragon’s breath” pepper paste that really does let you puff out a little smoke once a day.
  2. 2Forged travel papers — good enough for a sleepy border post, not for a suspicious one.
  3. 3A ring of nine keys. The dealer swears each one opens something in this city.
  4. 4A mummified hand that points toward the nearest gold, very slowly.
  5. 5A crate of crossbow bolts stamped with the city watch’s mark.
  6. 6A love letter in a famous noble’s handwriting — perfect for blackmail, if it’s genuine.
  7. 7A “healing potion” that is mostly beet juice and hope.
  8. 8A map of the sewers with three routes inked in red and one in black.
  9. 9A caged songbird trained to repeat the last thing it heard.
  10. 10A sealed scroll case the dealer is too frightened to open.
  11. 11A freshly laundered guard’s uniform with a small, neat hole over the heart.
  12. 12The name of a smuggler who can get anything past the harbor inspectors — for a second fee.
  13. 13Loaded dice that roll sixes for a week, then sevens.
  14. 14A vial of odorless sleeping draught, enough for one feast.
  15. 15A noble’s signet ring, reported stolen two days ago.
  16. 16A copy of the tax collector’s ledger with interesting notes in the margins.
  17. 17A shrunken head that gossips about its previous owners.
  18. 18Lockpicks carved from a single wyvern tail spine.
  19. 19A dagger that is cold to the touch and never quite dry.
  20. 20A bottle of fine wine from a vineyard that burned down ten years ago.
  21. 21Directions to a hidden shrine, written on the back of a wanted poster.
  22. 22A trained ferret that steals coin purses and brings them home.
  23. 23The deed to a farmhouse in a village that no longer appears on any map.
  24. 24A lantern whose light shows only things that are invisible.
  25. 25Smuggled spices worth ten times their weight in silver to the right cook.
  26. 26An egg the size of a helmet, warm, and heavier on one side.
  27. 27The services of a forger who can copy any handwriting from a single page.
  28. 28A dwarf-made lock that cannot be picked. The key is sold separately.
  29. 29A portrait of the queen with an extra, unexplained figure in the background.
  30. 30Black powder in a waxed bag labelled “flour” in three languages.
  31. 31A cursed coin that always returns to the purse of whoever spent it last.
  32. 32Tickets to a fighting pit that is not supposed to exist.
  33. 33A pouch of teeth, each from a different kind of monster.
  34. 34A potion labelled “Courage” that is just very strong rum.
  35. 35A wanted poster for one of the player characters, with a fair likeness.
  36. 36A spellbook with half its pages cut out and the rest written in code.
  37. 37A clay jar that whispers when the lid is lifted. The dealer wants it gone, today.
  38. 38Stolen temple incense that makes prayers feel answered.
  39. 39A rope that ties itself into any knot you describe out loud.
  40. 40A list of everyone who owes the local crime boss money.
  41. 41A shirt of chain mail that fits anyone and flatters no one.
  42. 42A glass eye that sees in the dark, for anyone with the socket for it.
  43. 43Giant spider venom in a vial that has started to crack.
  44. 44A cheap brass ring that hums whenever its wearer hears a lie.
  45. 45A ship’s figurehead of a weeping woman, salvaged from a wreck.
  46. 46Counterfeit gold pieces — convincing until someone bites one.
  47. 47An introduction to a fortune teller who is right far too often.
  48. 48A pair of boots that leave the pawprints of a large cat.
  49. 49A small clockwork bird that delivers one message, once.
  50. 50A box of chalk that draws doors on walls. The doors don’t open. Yet.